do you know what its like to wake up every morning hoping for a text, weither it be a simple “Hello” or a huge paragraph; it could be anything, anything to prove to me that you still think about me, that you still give a shit, that im not the only one. Do you know whats it like to wait for a phone call that isnt coming? Do you know what its like to feel like your heart is breaking everyday because i cant be with you? do you know whats its like to feel like things will never be the same? Do you know what its like to be completly in love that everytime your think of them your heart beats fast and your stomach feels weak and your eyes tear up yet you still have the slightest smile on your face? i do. do you know how i feel not knowing what your doing or who your with? does it kill you.. like it kills me? Ill be 17 in march and that means ive been talking to you for THREE years, three whole years… and for those 1 095.7266 days,1 577 846.3 minutes and 94 670 777.9  seconds, i never quit loving you. do you realize that?

life may seem a bit overwhelming at times but you can do it. Don’t let those ugly words and dirty looks get to you. Don’t act slutty for attention, because it’ll hurt you in the long run. If all he wants is in your pants, he doesn’t love you and giving him what he wants won’t make him love you either. No is always an option, use it. You can’t always have a wall built up. That anger you feel inside you can control and you can’t blame people for things they can’t change. Tell your mom you love her because even though she is sick, she trys so hard and she loves you. Hurting yourself isn’t the answer, quit holding everything inside. Its okay to cry. Being a heartless bitch doesn’t solve any problems. Smoking weed doesn’t make you cool. Drinking doesnt make you cool either. Focus on school because it’ll pay off. Dear 15 year old me, so much has changed in the past year, I think you are much happier now. Sincerly, 16 year old me.

And sometimes I just wanna cry until I can’t cry anymore.

& I do.